Monday, February 23, 2009

Sugar + Alyson = OTP*

Last Saturday the 21st I decided not to even weigh myself. It's been an insane few weeks since my father-in-law died—very busy schedule for me, lots of running around and doing; and worst of all, my husband is gone very, very long hours trying to settle the estate. I've missed him, I've stressed out, I've consoled myself with all manner of Valentine's treats. And I decided, rather than let a weigh-in make me feel bad, I'd skip it for one week.

I haven't exercised in several weeks—much of it is the same schedule problems, lots of late nights and early mornings. But I finally decided last week that my current method isn't working. I need to get up a bit earlier, a half hour or so, and exercise before the kids get up. Yes, theoretically, I can carve a half hour out of my daytime schedule. And for a few months I was great at that. But now mostly I don't. And what's more, I use, "Haven't exercised yet!" as an excuse to hang around indecently long in my pajamas or workout clothes with my hair all over the place, embarrassed to open the door if someone knocks.

So today was the day. I hopped out of bed at 5:15 and was done working out by 6:00, in time to make lunches and breakfasts and all the things I usually do in the morning. While the kids ate breakfast I showered, and by school time I was already all dressed with hair done, ready for the day. Much, much better. I'm crossing my fingers for a better week this week.

I really need to kick my sugar addiction to the curb. I love sugar, and I eat way too much of it. And then, because I've already eaten some, I eat more. And I crave it. And I don't feel full from good, healthy food until I've had something sugary as a chaser. And I can easily eat as many calories of sugar as I do of food, ack. So I'm trying to cut out refined sugars this week. I'm not cutting out fruits or breads or any of the healthy things that contain sugar-like molecules, that would be unmanageable; but I 'm trying to get the treat consumption under control so I'm not always thinking about and looking for sugary treats.

It'll be tough, I'm not going to lie. This week I'm pre-menstrual (TMI!) and my one and only symptom of PMS is that I crave sugar. Like, exclusively. Hell if I want to even eat anything else. I'm dying for a cookie right now, thank heavens I don't have any. (Ate 'em all yesterday. :-/ )

*OTP in internet lingo means one true pairing, like when you think that actually Jo March should have married Laurie instead of Professor Bhaer in Little Women then you think Jo + Laurie = OTP. Like me 'n' sugar.

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Now playing: Bow Wow Wow - I Want Candy
via FoxyTunes

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Statistics

11 October 2008 was the day I was brave enough to step on the scale again, after a failed experiment in not weighing myself. My pants were getting tighter. It served as a kick in the butt, and revived my flatlining self control. The following week I did much better with portions, and with cutting out treats.

17 October I found eatstopeat.com and ravenously read all I could about it. So excited to start. (And so excited that the previous week's efforts paid off!)

8 November I'm worrying about whether the Eat Stop Eat program is actually working for me. I'm starting to feel like I'm doing something wrong.

29 November I'm not worried at all. Had a fabulous Thanksgiving two days ago, best vegetarian spread *evah*. Not surprised I gained a little, it won't be permanent, I'm already well into my first post-Thanksgiving Stop. Life is for enjoying, right? I'm losing weight for my own satisfaction, but the Thanksgiving meal was also for my own satisfaction and happiness. So I'm wildly contented. :)

6 December: Ten pounds! But it isn't "real". I weighed myself first thing in the morning after 36 hours of fasting, so a lot of it is water weight. I had a crazy food week and if I hadn't been fasting I'd have been contented with just hanging on to last week's 149!

17 January: The number is going in the wrong direction, and I absolutely know why. I'm eat eat eating instead of eat stop eating. :-/


Start11 Oct: 156.4
1 week18 Oct: 154.0
2 weeks22 Oct: 152.0
3 weeks25 Oct: 150.2
4 weeks 1 Nov: 150.6
5 weeks 8 Nov: 150.6
6 weeks15 Nov: 148.6

7 weeks22 Nov: 147.0
8 weeks29 Nov: 149.6
9 weeks 6 Dec: 146.4
10 weeks13 Dec: 144.4
11 weeks20 Dec: 144.2
12 weeks27 Dec: away on vacation :)
13 weeks 3 Jan: 146.8
14 weeks10 Jan: away visiting family
15 weeks17 Jan: 147.4
16 weeks24 Jan: 143.8
17 weeks31 Jan: 145.4
18 weeks 7 Feb: 143.6
19 weeks14 Feb: 143.4
20 weeks21 Feb: pass


Saturday, February 7, 2009

Why not be happy?

Two weeks ago: 143.8

Last week: 145.4
Not a surprise. Death in the family, almost no sleep, lots of emotional eating though I kept up my scheduled fasts.

This week: 143.4
Had a great week. Have been really struggling to catch up on sleep still, but all in all I'm very happy and upbeat. It's funny, when I did this weight loss thing in preparation for my 20-year high school reunion in 2007, I was contented with 140. Mentally I wanted to get to 130, but my effort slowed down with my complacency. I did have a single weigh in back then of 139.6 or something, but I never pushed the envelope. No such mental barrier this time; I'm definitely in the mindset of someone who wants to get to 130. But it's nice to have all my 140 pound clothes fit well again! :)

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Now playing: Radiohead - Reckoner
via FoxyTunes (am totally on a Radiohead kick right now)